Thanksgiving is here again, my friends, so the time has now arrived.
To remember how all of this began, and what wasn’t quite contrived.
I will endeavor to remember the facts,
Though it being Thanksgiving, in much drinking I have imbibed.
It all started for the Europeans when they landed on this shore.
They thought they could thrive with food and drink,
But they were wrong and crops grew no more.
Native Americans, then called Indians, though from India they were not;
Were true survivors and stewards of the land,
And could grow crops seemingly out of rot.
Chief Letsbefriends wanted to give the settlers food and drink,
His son Thisbebadidea argued against.
“We should not provide for these invaders,
“They should not be brought back from the brink.”
“They will take our food and take our lands, and offer not thing.”
“They will stick us on reservations,”
“They’ll remove anything of value, no more will we have bling.”
The Chief would hear none of it and simply gave his explanation.
“Son, these events may happen and you may be right,”
“But glory will come to our Native American Nation.”
“Revenge will be ours on the European parents, for in far future days,”
“Their children will have to spend months learning of us in schools,”
“But only remember we called our corn Maize.”
“We shall then assail their language, and force them to alter their ways.”
“We’ll attack them for the names of their sports teams,”
“And glory will be ours in those days.”
So they provided food and the settlers survived, paying them with a feast.
A real ugly fowl was dispatched and cooked.
And all ate until consciousness ceased.
And so it came to pass in history, and the events have happened as told.
Now pass me a drink, and leave me alone.
Oh these holidays make me feel so old!
Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!